10 minutes after I've masturbated if I smell my fingers, they smell like peanut butter. This leads me to believe my vagina is a jar of peanut butter.
Well I hope you find someone with a penis that smells like jelly.
I’d like to cancel my subscription to Menstrual Cycle Monthly
I’m sorry, it appears you’ve taken out a fifty-sixty year subscription. However, we can pause it for nine months as long as you sign a contract that says you’ll take out a subscription to Baby Daily for at least eighteen years
Damn those Terms and Conditions.
Some people have these like fandom specific blogs and then there’s me:
I WAS CROSSING THE FUCKING ROAD AND SOME MOTHERFUCKER TRIED TO RUN ME OVER BECAUSE NO ONE WAS AROUND OH I GUESS I CAN BREAK A FEW LAWS AND I GAVE HIM THE FINGER BUT BECAUSE I WAS WEARING MITTS IT LOOKED LIKE I WAS WAVING AND THE MOTHERFUCKER WAVED BACK
is this why canadians are mistaken as the most polite shits ever
i know i give white people a lot of shit but u guys are really nice. like when the light turns green and there’s a white pedestrian that’s almost across the street u guys always do that jog thing. i know it’s kind of insignificant but i appreciate it white people. u and ur half jog thing.
i think about this post every time i do the half jog thing
gettin’ real tired of your shit, sam and freddie
every times this comes around I laugh harder than the time before
bUT THEY DO
So I saw this post and I decided to lower the pitch of the laugh and